QUOTABLE QUOTES: Rabbi Berger, Mrs. Agulnik & Yankee Kopfstien

* This morning, the majority of Rabbi Berger’s class didn’t listen to his Shiur, so he turned to the class as a whole and said: “I will be happy to break someone’s neck today. My wife is out of town for two weeks and she is returning tomorrow, It will be a great pleasure to break someone’s neck. Anyone volunteer?”

When asked, if the person would stay alive after the neck is cracked, the Rabbi answered: “I will do it in a way that you will remain alive, there is nothing wrong with being alive. It will show the enormous compassion I have”

* Yankee Kopfstien was giving Sholom Ber silent treatment yesterday, therefore he didn’t talk to him, but at night he was desperate to have a conversation so he asked Yankele Lefton to be the “translator” from the British language to the English language. During the “conversation” he said: “Silent treatment means I don’t want to speak to him. When I talk to you I am talking to you and he doesn’t hear. When he talks to me I don’t hear, he can talk to you and I won’t hear”

* A conversation between Avi Wrubel & Mrs. Agulnik two days ago:
AW: “Can we go to the zoo?”
MA: “Why?”
AW: “I want to see Steven Agulnik”
MA: “I thought you wanted to see your relatives...”